Some people say that “God works in mysterious ways,” and tonight I feel like I witnessed that before my very eyes.
I was invited to an event at The Experience Church and heard a very faithful woman talk about her struggles with bipolar disorder. Before I went I had no idea she was going to be there and less of an idea of what to expect from the evening.
Before the guest speaker spoke Pastor Linda delivered an amazing talk. She talked about how there is power in our past and that we can reach back and use those painful experiences and help other people. I was listening intently as I have embarked on a journey to use my past pains to help raise awareness for mental illness.
God knows for sure how much I have suffered with bipolar disorder and I have stayed away from church because quite honestly I have been angry with God. But I remembered tonight that in my darkest moments and most painful times in my life I always prayed for God to get me through it.
When I found myself in terrifying places all alone I prayed. In one tragic experience during a bipolar episode I almost lost my life. Lost and all alone with my life at risk I prayed. If I had not of done that I really don’t know what would have happened to me.
As I began to recover I faced disappointment and struggled with grief so much that I became angry with God for letting me have a mental illness. I needed someone to blame right?
So tonight when I listened to the music and heard the guest speaker talk about her challenges with bipolar disorder it became clear to me that I was supposed to be there and hear the messages. It was divine intervention that brought me there.
“There is power in your past” and past pain does not have to haunt you. Healing has definitely taken place and I humbly thank God for that and plan to allow myself to live a more inspired life.